Politics: Democrats

Court jesters Something Awful recently covered the Democratic Party "debate". Hilarious as always. A particularly noteworthy line about Hillary Clinton:

It's great to see diversity and all, but she's more of an old rich white man than most of us will ever be. When her jackbooted thugs smash your door down and uninstall Grant Theft Auto from your PC Personal Computer, don't say I didn't warn you.

This nicely encapsulates a number of issues for me:

• All the candidates on both sides are basically "more of the same".
  
• Hillary is an old rich white man, for all intents and purposes.
  
• Aside from the usual fascists, hypocrites, and liars, the Republicans are fielding a guy who is basically the 21st-Century version of "Gopher" from The Love Boat and a "family values" candidate with no real qualifications aside from having his city attacked. Watching them enthusiastically endorse torture is truly sickening.
  
• The Democrats aren't much better. These days they would be more accurately represented by a jellyfish (spineless and toothless) than a jackass. They are responsible for the PMRC and music labeling, most of the videogame ridiculousness, and worst of all, the DMCA and the continuing extension of copyright.
  
• Their candidates aren't proving to be any better than their Republican counterparts. Apparently the Democratic plan is something like "if we don't take any positions or stand up for anything, we can't lose!"
  
• Our political process and the media prevent us from getting anything substantial out of any of the candidates during the campaign process. We get endless empty promises.

The entire election gets reduced to the equivalent of a web forum poll or American Idol. Given the minimal level of thought we, the people demand from these jokers (and the clowns who talk to us about them), it's probably no more than we deserve.

Candidates, here's my deal. Promise me you will deliver on any of the following and I will give you my vote and work hard to deliver the votes of anyone I know:

• Out of Iraq within 18 months of taking office
• "Manhattan Project" for green energy
• Revise CAFE laws to mandate dramatically better fuel efficiency (or replace CAFE with laws that make sense and work)
• Raise taxes (Yeah, I said it. I will gladly pay some money to help maintain our country.)

I don't care what party you're in. Do something. Make a difference.